just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
