Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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