well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
