omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
