its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
