Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
