Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
