Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
