I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
