I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
