I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Randomize
