I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Randomize
