nut hugger
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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