If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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