so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
