do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
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