no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
