I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
someone get that fucking seahorse.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
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