it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize
