is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
