hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I made him laugh his dick is mine
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Randomize
