Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
