You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
