...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
