Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
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