I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
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