maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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