you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
He shit in the fireplace
Randomize