Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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