it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Randomize
