i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
