Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Randomize
