I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
