the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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