I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
