Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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