ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
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