This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
