Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
