i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
