Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
