I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Those nachos came to me in a dream
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
