Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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