If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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