it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
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