i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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