I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
