I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
