3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
