I should be sponsored by Trojan
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
